The Ketamine Chronicles

When I started the Spravato I had high hopes for it.  I guess I hoped for a miracle and although I didn’t get a miracle I did see results eventually and I had hope that it was moving me in a positive direction.  In the final weeks prior to this post I had lost my suicidal ideation completely and although I wasn’t exactly skipping through the daisies, I did feel more level and stable emotionally.  I was even trying to expand my social circle which I had extremely limited the last few years.  But stick your neck out and get it cut off I guess.  Once the covid hit me things changed.  I was not just physically sick from covid.  Yes there is the initial illness and you struggle with the symptoms, always new and always changing.  There is the loss of smell and taste which has been hard physically when I would bleach my bathroom and was unable to smell it, or sprayed the Lysol and was affected by the aerosol fumes physically but couldn’t smell it so I ...

Driving home from work I noticed I had a mild sore throat. The hotel usually gives me a mild agitation in my throat from the AC blowing on me all night so I didn’t think much of us until the next morning when I woke up and that sore throat was full blown. I had my ketamine scheduled for 11 so I decided to do a covid test to be safe.  I was negative but my throat was really sore so I decided to call my dr who told me I had seasonal allergies.  No offense to his knowledge but I knew it was NOT seasonal allergies. I also knew there was little they could do for a sore throat anyway and started to regret even calling the doctor in the first place.  I arrive at the clinic and had some trepidation about how my throat would handle the Spravato.  Although you spray it in your nose it eventually drips down your throat.  I did my new technique where I just spray and don’t inhale and let it sit in my nose.  Then I pinch my nose closed to keep it in place.  So fo...